SlashNOT

Matthew writes: SuperEarth—the Planet of Nickel-Steel! SuperEarth hails from the Center of the Galaxy, where the Ultra-Blue rays from its cold, dim sun empower it with the power of icy coldness. Ever vigilant against the forces of OGLE—An elite cadre of evil scientists bent on exposing Earth-like planets throughout the Galaxy—SuperEarth is dedicated to the ideals of fair play, sportsmanship, and capitalism.

In this week’s power-packed adventure, SuperEarth discovers that its friend, regular Earth, is suffering from the dreaded Greenhouse Fever due to a severe biological infection. SuperEarth saves the sidereal day by using its G-force waves to pelt regular Earth with cleansing asteroids, clearing up the biological infection and returning Regular Earth to rosy-cheeked good health. This week’s episode is brought to you by Wheaties: Wheaties, that toothsome, whole-wheat crunch that will bring the look of rosy-cheeked good health to your little ones ones. Next week: SuperEarth vs. Jupitron and the Krypton Gas Giants! Tune in each week for the adventures of SuperEarth!