SlashNOT

Matthew writes: Sun Microsystems, which has seen four quarters of slumping sales and has a mere 4 billion in cash reserves, has announced that it is creating its first-ever laptop and leaving its warehouse doors open at night in an attempt to drive adoption of its platform.

A Sun spokesperson confirmed that they were also turning all the security cameras off, and that there were no night watchmen on duty. He also provided the corporate address and noted the presence of a U-Haul truck leasing facility a mere six miles down the road.

“This came out of a C-level brainstorming session we had on how to move boxes. Scott [McNealy] said ‘fuck it, let’s just let the unsold boxes get stolen. They’ll inevitably wind up in someone’s hands, and maybe, just maybe, that someone will write the next great Solaris application.”