SlashNOT

Matthew writes: In a bizarre juxtaposition of coincidence, horror, and postmodern industrial lore, the “Human Finger in a Bowl of Chili” urban legend has accidentally come true.

This particular urban legend has been told many ways but it usually involves meaty dark soups such as chili or menudo. The story is a member of an urban legent species with many variations, from mice and cockroaches in soda bottles to deep-fried rats served up in a bucket of chicken.

But this particular urban legend turned to suburban horror earlier this week when an unidentified woman bit down on a human finger that had been cooked in her bowl of Wendy’s chili in Santa Clara, CA. Authorities have been on a hunt for the rest of the person since yesterday. The person is believed to have been a woman because the finger had a long, manicured nail.

A spokesman for Wendy’s confirmed that “All of our employees have ten digits” but added that he had ordered a recount just to be on the safe side. He also indicated that all of their Chili suppliers have indicated no accidents. “It’s probably just a piece of a meatpacker’s ex-wife that didn’t get ground up small enough. I don’t expect any employee liability problems to come out of this.”

When asked whether customers were still buying chili Thursday, an employee at the Wendy’s responded darkly, “We always sell a lot of chili.”