Mind Control Chip Not Under Construction, Claims CIA PR Director
Posted by Matthew on Sunday February 20, 2005 @01:10PM
from the foiled-again dept.
StarBird writes:
Tululah, Ohio: At the recent tri-annual conference of the American National Association of Foil Hats Against Mind Rays (ANAFHAMR), incorporating Alien Abductees United (AAU) and Fathers Against Bugs (FAB), CIA Public Relations Director B. Randon Messersmith 3rd told delegates categorically that there were no mind control chips for the general population being developed as had been widely feared.
“Although only small electrical charges are needed to stimulate the brain, that is not the whole story,” says Messersmith. “To change the average American mind on anything would require the voltage of a small car battery. And because of the size and weight issues involved, that is just not practical.”
Subject:Suggestion
How about activating it with one of those 'tazer' devices. Failing that, how about with a cattleprod?
Comment by Buzz Bee — February 20, 2005 @ 3:44 pm
Subject:Re: Suggestion
Doesn't work. I've tried it. Make sure you use the bathroom before you tazer yourself, by the way.
Comment by Matthew — February 20, 2005 @ 5:44 pm