Private Spacecraft launches new era in Space
Posted by Matthew on Monday June 21, 2004 @05:18PM
from the pimp-my-satire dept.
Matthew writes: Space Ship One, the brainchild of Burt Rutan’s Scaled Composites privately financed spacecraft development company, has soared above the reach of Earth’s Atmosphere into sub-orbital space.
Unlike Spartan NASA spacecraft piloted by astronauts, private spacecraft are not subject to the strict military inspired procedures and function-over-form designs that guide the development of government space vehicles.
Pilot Mike Mellville took a moment away from his cruise into space to address reporters from the cockpit. Resplendit in a Leopard skin sport jacket and sipping a Martini, Mike spoke of the day when passengers would be able to share in the mahogany paneled and shag carpeted finery aboard SpaceShipOne, which just one week earlier had been pimped out by West Coast Customs and featured on MTV’s Pimp My Ride .
“Yeah Baby. These are Crazy times! Just Crazy! Check this out [at which point he spins the martini glass slowly in space and then slurps up the globules of cocktail]. That’s the bomb Baby! Oh, and look—the control monitors play video poker! You Cats have to do this! Oh, and check it out— there’s no drug laws in space players! [at which point he fires up a blunt and takes a long drag]. That’s one small drag for a man, one giant hit for mankind right there. Yeah, it’s so mellow up here, with the stars, and the moon. Oh, and check out this killer moon roof they put in…”