SlashNOT

Mearzuh writes: After the big DOT-COM layoffs, the airline layoffs and other mass layoffs, corporate employers are searching for faster, easier, cheaper, and more heartless ways of dismissing their loyal employees when quarterly profits don’t meet Wall Street expectations. They have found hope in a new technology called eSlips.

eSlips uses Microsoft’s Exchange Server technology to bulk e-mail layoff notices to easily created lists of employees. Using eSlip’s patented one-click fire button, all an employer has to do is click it, and voila: up to 100,000 people at a time are laid off. Strong Active Directory integration means that entire Organizational Units can be laid off simply by disabling their user accounts.

The laid-off employees receive a pink email informing them of their misfortune. Optionally, employers may add links to jobseeking websites within the eSlip. Employers are raving about this new software, and Apple, Inc is already working on its own version, called iSlip, which is targeted towards students and web developers who want to dump their friends or significant others.