U.S. Releases Cyber Security Plan

Posted by Matthew on Sunday February 16, 2003 @04:38PM

from the Counter-intelligence dept.

Internet

Matthew writes: The White House released a first draft of a Cyber Security Plan this week that is intended to harden the U.S. portions of the Internet against attack in the event of war. The document is too large to cover in detail, but here are the highlights:

  1. Everyone stop sending e-mail.
  2. Backbone routers on curfew from 9:00 p.m. to 9:00 a.m.
  3. Enlist porn industry to help get the word out.
  4. Everyone use really hard password: “chrthwiaprl”.
  5. Revoke Microsoft Passports of suspected terrorists.
  6. Release “Code Orange” worm to automatically lock down Microsoft web servers.
  7. Redirect AOL CD mailings to Iraq.
  8. Provide Arabic versions of Microsoft Outlook for free to anyone.
With these measures, the administration is confident that any cyber-attack will have little to no impact on Internet users.

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2 Comments

  1. Subject:The Microsoft Solution

    Well, if everyone used Microsoft, I'm sure those hackers wouldn't even be able to send e-mail, much less build & test a sophisticated buffer overrun attack.

    Comment by Tyson — February 17, 2003 @ 11:48 pm

  2. Subject:No Subject Given

    I think you left out:

    • Distribution of duct tape to seal off vulnerabilities in Windows and IE.
    • Random searches of anyone approaching Fry's Electronics.
    • Offer Windows 98 to anyone in Iraq, for free
    • Announcement of a color coded scheme to indicate cyber threat levels. Colors will include “Black” meaning a threat is eminent, “Black” meaning a threat has already occurred, “Black” meaning you should raise your panic level, and “White” if you are running Mac OS X or Linux.

    Comment by Ed — February 23, 2003 @ 6:11 pm

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