SlashNOT

Matthew writes: In a recent scientific poll conducted by chic Internet portal Slashnot, Internet Service Provider I Don’t Live In The U.S. You Arrogant Bastards (IDLITUSYAB) easily outdistanced AOL as the worst ISP. The poll, responded to by tens if not dozens of voters, was conducted over the course of the past few days and is still ongoing.
“We were shocked frankly, explained Slashnot’s enigmatic Minister of Silly Walks, Matthew (Matthew has not adopted a last name,and his true name is unpronouncable by humans). “This is the first time that AOL has ever come out better than dead last in any poll of ISPs.”
Arvin Firth, general manager of IDLITUSYAB had this to say about the results of the Poll: “We’re shocked. Shocked and dismayed. Shocked, dismayed, and agitated. If this is what people think, then I don’t know why we’re spending money on our two tech support guys.”
AOL’s Grand Thrice Illustrious Master of arcane mysteries and Chairman Steve Case was jubilant at the news. “We’ve sacrificed thousands of support technicians to Cthulhu in an attempt to improve our call hold times, and these numbers show that our efforts are beginning to make a difference. I couldn’t be happier.”